Saturday, March 13, 2010

How did we meet? Fair Lady's Version

The Setting (June-July 2008)

In the weeks before I met Fair Sir, my hopes for finding a good, honest man had been dashed. I witnessed three men actively cheating on their women, while being enabled by friends. One had his girl preggers with his second child while arguably living with her, yet not claiming her nor mentioning a 5-6 month old fetus. One of these dudes had attempted to continue talking to me after I discovered he had a girl, and I had to let him know that not only were we just acquaintances because of initial physical attraction and a number he shouldn't have gotten, but that I play for the women's team in terms of enabling. There would be no shady "friendship" with me. HUmph! And I spent a few days and nights agonising over what I could to to pull myself out of my negative thinking. I decided to do the opposite of what I felt. I decided to meet MORE people and put myself in the path of more of what may be right. In other news- I'd just gotten brand new living room furniture for my solo bachelorette pad and was otherwise fulfilled.

The Story (August, 2008)

I was invited to a private birthday party of a friend of a friend I'd met once or twice. With my new attitude in tow, I put on a little black dress, did my hair all cute, and hopped in my car alone to go meet them at the venue, which was a club. When I found it, I could not find safe/free parking for the life of me and was just about to head home defeated. I pulled over and text one of my girls inside to tell her how discouraged I was. She informed me that valet was free and that was the only parking, so pheew... I should hurry up. I'm soooo glad I made it in there because my life changed that night.

So we were all jovial - enjoying the open bar and birthday games - when a few strangers came in with another friend of a friend. I immediately noticed the tall, handsome fellow with a funky outfit (pointy shoes and smedium shirt), lil fro and unique glasses on. But I played it cool, didn't say anything and we were not introduced. A friend found out who he was and excitedly reported back a few tidbits of info that seemingly favored herself, so I decided I'd fall back and let them/him decide who made a pass at who. I essentially deferred myself out of the running for his attention. lol.

BUT, about 10 min later, he came up and introduced himself to me. He was really cute and charming up close, and I found myself beginning to flirt during our little small talk. I realised what I was doing, and again, I backed off. I ended the conversation and slinked away.

I did, however, continue to track his location with a side eye. At one point I thought he left and kind of gave up and got sad, but then he came back! But still didn't come back around me.

Later on we had gotten heavy into a sort of treasure hunt birthday game, that forces guests to work together to solve a puzzle. I found myself face to face with him again, surrounded by a couple of other people, debating over puzzle pieces. Fair Sir started an argument with me over my being a selfish game player, and everyone else literally disappeared.

As we "debated," I lost sense of what was really going on and I told him to "go play with someone else" if he thought I was being so unfair. Then this man said "I'm talking to the only person I feel like talking too." I thought to myself- !wow! He likes me and I didn't start this so I'm going WITH it (score!). I was so excited on the inside.

I actually only remember snippets of our convo after that, such as us planning our first date while still there in the club, exchanging our stance on being single, and a bit of our backgrounds. We didn't separate for the whole rest of the night. We danced, sat on the couches talking and I forgot about the rest of the party at large. When I left that night I was already anticipating his call and our date. I went to bed actually nervous that he wouldn't call, and wondering how sincere it all was. It seemed too good to be true- that I would see a man I was interested in and then get all of his attention and then have such great conversation all night. But it happened just like that. And he called.

Apparently he called the next day, but I was in the pool and he did not leave a message. I saw the missed call from a random number but I was not sure who it was. I feared/hoped it was him and that he would call again. On Monday night I was on a date that was going downhill fast when the phone rang. I saw a random number again and I boldly answered it while at the table with my date. I know- shame. But it was HIM! I asked to call him back. I hurried the rest of the date, and was dismayed when the nice guy I was with insisted he walk me to my car. I pulled a "there is my car over there! thanks" -as soon as I could see it. I thanked him for the night and had my phone in my hand before I even had my keys out.

We talked my whole 40 min drive home. We had several 3-6 hour long conversations before our first date. Our first date lasted for something like 10 hours or something crazy. I liked him a lot, fast. This was different. I loved talking to him and being around him and we fast became truly inseparable. He was available to me in more ways than I had seen in years from any man. We had so much in common and talked naturally and enthusiastically about every and anything. We knew we wanted to be together at an unreasonably early point, and even talked about it being too early to declare it. We actually set a date upon which to make it publicly official on FaceBook, a month after we met.

We are MFEO (March, 2010)
Now here we are, living together, moving forward like ants taking the bread. It's conscious love, heady love, deep love and profound friendship. I'm so lucky and proud to have Fair Sir to my rescue, and I look forward to evolving our love past love, past words.


  1. I really enjoyed reading both stories! It sounds like it was basically love at first site. That is so sweet. :-)

    -K.D. of &

  2. This is too cute! Your two are a reminder that Black love is alive and strong in spite of what the mainstream media says.

    Thanks for sharing your stories. :-)